The Seeking of Yuki Nagato - 1/3 - Seat of Dreams

THE SEEKING OF YUKI NAGATO
1/3  The Seat Of Dreams

I had that dream again.  Someone was calling my name.  Only I couldn't see them. And I couldn't hear them, if that makes any sense.  Only the the emptiness where they should be.  Like they were made out of glass or something.  Empty glass.  A feeling of emptiness.  Someone was missi...

The alarm shocked me awake.  I shot bolt upright in bed.  Shamizan yowled in fright and shot across the room to hide under my chest of drawers, where he gave me that kind of evil look that only a cat can.

My heart was pounding.  I whipped my head around but nothing was out of place... missing.  Just a dream.  It was just a bad dream.  A nightmare.  Mind you, after all the stuff Haruhi's put us through lately, can you blame me?

The door opened and trouble came rushing in.
“Hey sis”, I greeted her.

“Oh.  You're awake”.  She sounded disappointed.  The usual morning routine of her rushing in and dragging the covers off me, usually ending up with me on the floor clinging to them for dear life had become pretty much that.  A routine.

“Well.  I could always pretend to be asleep, if you want”, I teased her.  She leaned her head to one side while she thought seriously about it.  She can be so cute at times.  That's probably why we let her get away with stuff all the time.

“Nah”, she decided.  “I'll just have to wake up extra early tomorrow morning to make sure you're still asleep properly”.

Oh great.

And with that she rushed back out again giggling at the thought, and shouting for mom.



It was early February.  School had been back after the winter break for a while now.  And that cold snap had decided it was time to go and bother somebody else.  Maybe some penguins or something.  I don't know.  But it almost felt like spring in comparison.

After lessons, I headed for the sanctuary of the SOS Brigade clubroom.  Not that it would be a sanctuary for very long, of course.  A certain somebody had been way too quiet for that last week or so.  So it was probably about time for another of her hare-brained schemes.

Of course, it wasn't really the SOS clubroom any more.  After Haruhi's hot pot incident over Christmas, the SOS Brigade had been officially disbarred by the school.  Haruhi had been furious, which in turn had made Koizumi and all the others very nervous.  In the end it was Asakura that pulled our butts out of the fire.

She pointed out that it was only right and good that the SOS Brigade was disbanded.  Because they'd, well we'd, but you know what I mean.  They'd been using that room illegally.  After all, the room actually belonged to the Literary Club, of which she was the only member.  All the other members had left when they graduated the year before.  But the club hadn't been shut down because Asakura was an honours student, and class president.  And all that.

So the next day, we all joined the Literary Club, and things went pretty much back to normal.  And the teachers couldn't really say a thing about it.

“Hey.  Kyon.  Wait up”.
Speak of the devil.  I turned to see that bouncing head of blue hair running to catch me up.  Where did she get all that energy.  She was almost as bad as Haruhi.  I mean, one smart, wilful, energetic girl was bad enough.  But two.  That was a nightmare.

“You going to the clubroom?”, she asked.  “I'll walk with you”.  She was getting to be as bad as Haruhi for those assumptions.  I might have been going somewhere else.  I mean I wasn't.  But I might have been.

We walked along in silence.  Which was quite unusual.  Miss Asakura was one of those girls who seemed to be able to fill up any space with happy conversation.  I'd gotten to the point now where I could sort of tune her out, and get back to worrying about whatever it was Haruhi was planning next.  I must admit though, I found it a little disconcerting at times.  For a self-confessed alien... sorry 'Human Interface of the Data Integration Thought Entity', she was kinda the most human of all of us.

We reached the clubroom and she stepped in front of me.  
“I'll go in first”, she said with a smile, “So I can check Mikuru's decent before you come in”.  I guess I couldn't argue with that.  Though to catch glimpses of the sweet, sweet Miss Asahina.  Even the thought had me blushing bright red.  

“Okay.  You can come in now”, she called through the door.

I opened the door and walked straight into a pillow thrown with some force.  I mean I guess it could have been worse.  Since this was the Literary club now, it could have been a book, or a chair.
“You're Late, Kyon!  Penalty.  You're getting a fine, mister.  This is the second time this week.  And it's my job to uphold standards around here!”.  Haruhi yelled at me.

Typical.
Everyone was here already.  Haruhi.  Miss Asahina, dressed once again in the maid outfit Haruhi made her wear.  At least it wasn't the frog costume this time.  It was just plain weird to walk into the room to be served tea by a giant frog.  Oh and Koizumi of course.  Smirking gently to himself as usual.  It wasn't even as if I was actually late.  I was on time.  It's just that everyone else had been early.  I glared at Asakura, who was just taking her seat.  But she just gave me one of her cheeky dimpled smiles.

I thought about arguing the unfairness of it all since Asakura had arrived at exactly the same time as I had, but it was just too much effort.  Besides, I'd never win.  Her lord and Haruhiship had already made up her mind.

I was just taking my seat at the table while Haruhi harped on about what sort of punishment I should get today, when I noticed the chair.  It was one of those metal folding ones.  It was just sitting there, empty, by the window.  Strange.  I don't recall anyone ever sitting by the window.  This part of the school was quite old and the windows weren't very well draught-proofed.  It'd be a very cold place to sit for any length of time.  I felt a small shiver run down my spine.  Probably in sympathy.

“Are you even listening!”, Haruhi suddenly shouted right beside my ear.  I jumped.  “What's so interesting about the window?”, she asked in genuine curiosity.  “I mean, you've been staring at it for like ten minutes”.

“I was just wondering about that chair.  I mean since we're all here.  Who's chair is that by the window”.  I was kind of puzzled by the chair.  But I think she was exaggerating things a bit.  Ten minutes.  Really?

“Err... What chair?”, she asked.  Sounding slightly worried.

I turned to stare at her.
“That chair!”, I yelled, pointing. “Na...”.  I lost that train of thought when she interrupted.

“There's no chair there, what are you talking about?”, she demanded.  “I think you've been spending far too much time indoors, mister.  You're starting to go funny in the head”.  

I'm staring to go funny in the head!  
Physician heal thyself, Haruhi.

She grabbed me by the jacket, pulling me out of my seat.  When Haruhi gets an idea in her head, the hounds of Hell couldn't stop her.  What chance did I stand.
“I think you need some fresh air.  Ten laps round the track ought to do it”.
She switched her grip the the familiar grab of the tie and literally dragged me out of the clubroom by it.  Protesting all the way.  For all the good it did me.

She actually made me do it as well.  Ten laps of the school track.  In full uniform.  That girl was a monster.  Though to be fair she did run every step with me.  But that's not the point.  As I staggered over the line for the last time and collapsed, gasping for breath.  She was still bouncing around like the Energiser Bunny.  In what world was that fair.

“Okay, that'll do for today, then.  I'm off home now.  See ya”.  She turned around and picked up her bag, and headed for the gates.  What.  She'd brought her bag with her!  My bag was back in the clubroom she'd dragged me out of.  Along with my coat.  And as if on cue, I suddenly remembered it was February, and I was drenched in sweat.  And bloody freezing.

I climbed wearily to my feet and shambled along to the clubroom, trying to rub some warmth and life back into my arms as I went.

I opened the door.
“Oh, hey.  I just need to grab my stuff”.  

Now what in the world made me say that.  It just seemed to come out.  There was nobody here, of course.  Koizumi, Asakura and Miss Asahina had already left some time ago.  Of course there was no-one here.  So why did that feel... wrong.

I looked over at the window again.  The chair wasn't there.  Was Haruhi right?  Had I just imagined it?  Or maybe someone had just tidied it away.  I looked around.  My coat and bag were still hanging off the back of my chair.  I ignored them.

I found the folded metal chair in the corner behind the rack of Miss Asashina's cosplay costumes.  It was covered in dust.  It looked like it hadn't been used in years.  I pulled it out anyway.  I brushed the dust off it with my hand and unfolded it.  It was stiff from lack of use, but it finally gave with a creak.  I put in place by the window.  It looked... right.

I sat down on my own chair, staring at the stupid metal chair.  What the Hell was I doing.  I should be home right now, not fiddling around rearranging the furniture in the clubroom.  I put my head in my hands on the desk in front of me.  Maybe Haruhi was right.  Maybe I was losing it.
…
..
.

Someone was shaking my shoulder.

“Kyon.  Kyon!”.  
Haruhi shook me again.

I blinked and looked up at her.
“Huh?”.

She had a worried look on her face.  It was very un-Haruhi-like.
“Are you all right?”.  She put her face right next to mine, and stared at me.

I jumped.  That was just downright weird.
“What are you doing?”, I asked her.  “I thought you went home”.

“I did”.  She frowned. “Your mom called.  She was worried when you didn't come home”.

“Wha.. What are you talking about, Haruhi.  I only came back to get my bag...”.  I looked out of the window.  It was dark outside.  Night dark.  What the...

She slipped under my arm and put her arm around my waist.  With a heave she forced me to my feet.  “Come on, mister.  It's time to get you home before your mom calls the police or something.  Do you know how much trouble you've caused.  I've been all over town looking for you!”.

I looked at her.
“Were you worried about me, Haruhi?”.

She tossed her head in an off-hand manner.
“Of course not.  But I couldn't have your little sister getting all panicked because you fell asleep at your desk now, could I?”.

Hah.  You were.  You so were.

She froze.  She was staring at the window.
“Is that it?  Is that the chair you were on about before?”.
She ducked out from under my arm and ran over to it.  Not expecting it, I stumbled and almost fell when she let go of me.  So much for worried.

“It looks like it hasn't been used for years”, she said, looking it over carefully.

“I hasn't.  I found it in the corner, behind the costume rack.  I don't think it's been used since before we started the SOS Brigade.  But that's not the point, Haruhi.  The point is...”, I let out the breath I was holding.

“How did I know it was there at all?”.


Haruhi insisted on walking me the entire way home.  Which wasn't entirely unpleasant.  If you can ignore the worried looks she kept giving me when she thought I wasn't looking.  Subtlety isn't one exactly one of Haruhi's strong points.

When I got home, I got bawled out by mom for making everyone worry.  And my little sister kinda sat on top of me until she fell asleep.  Which wasn't long because it was already way after her bedtime.  It was sort of annoying but kinda sweet at the same time.

After tucking her in, I claimed a headache and went to bed myself.  Well, more sort of fell into bed really.  Shamizen took his usual place by my feet.  He was looking at me funny.  I swear I wouldn't have been surprised if he started to tell me off too.  It had been that kind of day.

I couldn't sleep.  Every time I closed my eyes all I saw was that bloody chair.  What was it about that chair?  It was just a chair.  It wasn't even a good one.  Why was it so special?!

I must have fallen asleep because I dreamed.
I dreamed that dream again.  The same dream.  But not the same.  Something was missing.  Someone wasn't there.  Had never been there.  I saw the chair, sitting in front of the window.  Exactly where I had placed it.  There was someone in the chair.  I couldn't see them.  I couldn't hear them speaking my name.  Though I knew they were.  But I could feel them.  I could feel their eyes on me.

It was like I was looking at the clubroom.  Haruhi was forcing Miss Asahina into another cosplay outfit. A robot or an alien or something.  Asakura was herding me, another me that was, and Koizumi out of the room to protect whatever was left of Mikuru's dignity.  Everything was just as it should be.
Except it wasn't.  It was like we were all ghosts.  I could see right through everyone and everything.  Except the chair.  It sat there, worn.  Not from age and dust, but from use.  It was real.  It was the only thing there that was real.

School went by in a daze.  I didn't even hear the lectures.  Lunch was just tasteless fuel.  Tanuguchi and Konikida accosted me while I was eating it.
“So... buddy.  What's your secret”.
I froze.  Did everyone know about my zone out.  Was the whole school laughing at me behind my back.

“Yeah.  How do you do it?”.  Konikida backed up Tanuguchi's line of questioning.

“Do what!”, I snapped.  “You're not making any sense”.

“Whoa.  Calm down, dude”.  Tanuguchi tried to placate me.  “I meant about the club an' all.  I mean first of all you got Suzumiya who is an A+ hottie, if a little on the strange side.  Talking to you like you're her BFF every day.  Even making you join her weird club.  When the rest of us can barely get a word out of her.  

“And don't forget Mikuru Asahina”, Konikida added.  

“Oh yeah.  And then she goes and drags Mikuru Asahina into it.  And Suzumiya's got her dressing up in all those cosplays and stuff”, Tanuguchi was practically drooling at the thought.
“And now you've gone and roped Ryoko Asakura into it too.  I mean she is one class A+++ hottie.  She's got looks, she's an honour student, class president”.

He paused.
“So come on, man.  How do you do it?”

I wanted to laugh.  He was so bothered about me being surrounded by hot girls, which I do have to admit is kind of a bonus.  But he had no idea about all the weirdness that went with it.  I mean yeah, everyone knew Haruhi was a bit nutty.  But Mikuru Asahina was a time traveller from the future, and Asakura was an alien android.  Which gave me an idea.

“It's Suzumiya's brand of weirdness”, I confessed in a whisper.  “It's catching.  I mean she's practically got Miss Asahina believing she's a time traveller.  And Asakura's supposed to be an alien”.  We glanced over to where Asakura was chatting animatedly with a group of girls.  “I mean, come on.  Does she look like an alien to you?”.

I leaned in closer.  “But I tell you.  It's catching.  I might even be infected.  I mean didn't you hear what happened to me last night...”.  If they hadn't already, they soon would.  This was high school, it wasn't like you could keep anything a secret for long here.

I was saved by the timely arrival of Asakura.
“How are you feeling today, Kyon?  We were all so worried about you after what happened last night”.

Tanuguchi and Konikida both jumped back shock and even a touch of fright.  
Score!

Right into the brooding presence of Haruhi herself.
Double Score!!

They froze absolutely still.  I could see their eyeballs trying to swivel round the backs of their heads to see what they already felt was there.   Haruhi stood there with her hands on her hips and a brooding frown.  But if there's one thing Haruhi has in spades, it's presence.  She cleared her throat noisily.  That was all it took.  The pair of them actually jumped and then bolted.  With Haruhi's stare of death following them all the way.  She turned it on me next.  But I've had so much practice I'm practically immune.  Practically.

Haruhi slid into her chair at the desk behind me.  Her expression changed from mad to concerned.
“Are you sure you're all right?”, she asked.  I was sort of shocked.  Haruhi's not usually overly concerned about other people.  

Asakura sat herself on the edge of my desk, and placed the back of her hand against my forehead.  
“You know.  If you're not feeling well, I can take you to see the nurse”.

“I'm fine”.  I told her a little snappily.  All this attention was starting to feel cloying.  But then I saw the tops of Tanuguchi and Konikida's heads staring at me through the window from the hallway.  So I sort of just put my hands behind my head and tried to look like I was enjoying it.  “I was just exhausted after Haruhi here made me run ten laps of the school track.  So I guess I just sorta fell asleep”.

Haruhi made an irritated little clicking noise with her tongue, and then clipped me across the back of the head.  “Wimp”, she complained.  So much for concerned then.

But I must admit, the whole incident sort of perked me up a bit.  Or distracted me anyway.  I almost forgot about the whole chair thing.  Classes continued.  Life went on.  

I walked to the clubroom on my own.  It had been my turn for clean-up duty after class.  It was a forlorn hope that Haruhi would except this as an excuse for being late, of course.  I didn't knock before I entered.  Miss Asahina would have had plenty time to get changed before now.  I just opened the door and went in.

Everyone froze.  Mikuru looked worried.  Even Haruhi looked like a kid caught with her hand in the candy jar.  Koizumi was fighting with the chair.  That chair.  I don't mean actual fighting, it wasn't alive or anything.  He was trying to force it shut to put it away.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING!”, I yelled.  “Put that back!  Put it back!”,  I was across the room and trying to pull it out of his hands before I knew what I was doing.  He was so shocked he just let it go.  Everyone was staring at me.  Mikuru made a small whimpering sound.

I stopped.  I couldn't explain it.  Even to myself.
I had the chair grasped to me like it was something valuable, important.

“Look”, I said.  “There's something about this chair.  I can't explain it.  I don't understand it myself.  But this chair.  Its supposed to be here.  Right here!”, I forced it fully open, and thumped it on the floor in front of the window.

Something flew up into the air and slowly fluttered to the floor.  I was too shocked to do anything but stare.  It was Haruhi who picked it up.  It was a crumpled mess.  She did her best to flatten it out.
“It's some kind of card”, she said.  She twisted it around trying to make out what was written on it.  “I think it's a library card or something”.

“Well that does make sense”, Koizumi explained.  “After all, this is a literary club”.  He folded and unfolded the chair.  “It seems to have been stuck in the mechanism.  That's why the chair was so hard to fold”.

“Give me that!”, I snatched the card out of Haruhi's hand, ignoring her yell of protest.  Koizumi frowned.  I know we're not supposed to upset Haruhi or anything, but this was different.  It might be important.  It might explain... explain what?  That was the thing.  I didn't know what the Hell it was supposed to explain.  But something.  Something wasn't right.

And why did I suddenly have the feeling I'd done this kind of thing before.  I mean not exactly this kind of thing.  But something.  Something very similar.  Right now it seemed the world was full of somethings.  I don't know what.  Or how.  Or why.  But I did know that chair was important.  And now.  Now there was this card.

“You're always complaining you're bored, Haruhi.  You like mysteries, don't you?  Well here's a mystery.  Right here!  Under our noses”, I was shouting again, and I don't know why.  “So lets do something.  Let's investigate or something!”.

“Now you listen here, mister!”, Haruhi yelled back at me.  “This is My club.  Mine.  You hear.  And they do what I say.  Me.  Not you.  And I say that's a stupid old library card that someone dropped!”.  She took a deep breath.  “This is a literary club.  It's probably from last years students or something.  I mean what are you going to do.  Go to the library and go through every card in the system.  That's not a mystery.  That's not exciting.  That's boring.  And we're not going to do it, you hear!”.
And she turned her back on me.

I was so angry and I couldn't say exactly why.  This was important.  This was more than important.  I knew it.  Why wouldn't she see it.

Because she's Haruhi.  Stubborn.  Selfish.  Haruhi.

“Well I'm going.  With or without you!”, I yelled.

“Don't you dare!”, she screamed back at me.  “Don't you dare walk out of that door.  Do you hear me, Kyon!  If you walk out that door now, don't bother coming back!  Ever!”.

I walked out the door and slammed it behind me.
I was so, so angry.  And somewhere deep inside I was hurting.  Hurting so badly.  I walked away from the club room.  From the SOS Brigade.

I could hear her furiously screaming my name as I did.  
And each time felt like a knife in my heart.